


I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else but you

by xsticknoodlesx



Series: Reader Inserts [12]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Book 5: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Misunderstandings, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Second Person, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-02-23 10:33:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23543503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xsticknoodlesx/pseuds/xsticknoodlesx
Summary: After your mother and father died at the hands of Deatheaters, Tonks' parents took you in. You grew up with her, went to Hogwarts a few years prior to her, so it came to no surprise that she eventually convinced you to join the Order of the Phoenix.You agree and eventually you and Sirius Black get closer to one another, but things are never as easy as they seem - especially not when no one seems to have any communication skills.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Reader
Series: Reader Inserts [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1417174
Comments: 4
Kudos: 37





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Haha, a new Reader Insert! No, seriously, I had this in my drafts for like months and finally decided to upload it! I have a lot of the chapters at the ready so I will upload them all quickly because I know more people will read it if there are already several chapters.
> 
> And just as an **important note** : No, **Tonks and the Reader are not related**. Reader's mom and Tonks' mom were best friends so they agreed to take in the other's child should anything happen to either of them. So Sirius and the Reader are not related, either. I specify it in the story, just thought I'd make it clear here.
> 
> Title from "Anyone Else but You" by The Moldy Peaches.
> 
> Enjoy ^^

“Come on.” Tonks urged you. “They are all really nice.”

“I know they are but I’m worried about trusting people.” You sighed. “You know that all too well.”

Tonks looked at you for a few seconds before sighing. “I understand why but, (Y/N), you know the Weasleys, right? You were best friends with Bill in school. They’re part of the Order, as well.”

You heaved a sigh but nodded. “I suppose I can trust you; we grew up together.”

“Yes, I mean we’ve been best friends for as long as I can remember.” Tonks smiled. “I mean you tended to be pretty annoying and a know-it-all but you were amazing.”

“Thanks.” You laughed. “At least I didn’t get into fights with Snape all the time.”

Tonks put up a finger. “I didn’t get into fights with him. I impersonated him and he couldn’t take a joke.”

“It wasn’t just one joke, it was more like he couldn’t take a thousand jokes.” You chuckled. “No wonder you and Remus are dating. He was best friends with James, right? And James dated Lily and Snape was really obsessed with her and angry at James and- I don’t know where I’m going with this, actually.”

“I can tell.” The other witch laughed. “Now come on, a talented witch such as yourself is exactly what we need.”

She headed inside and you quickly followed. “I’m sure everyone else is just as talented, if not more talented than me.”

“Will you-”

“Tonks!” Molly exclaimed and ran over to the woman to hug her. “Hello, my dear. Did you have a good flight here? No Death Eaters or anything?”

“Nope but I did bring someone with me.”

“I was going to ask who she was.” Remus commented as he walked past Molly to put an arm around Tonks.

“(Y/N).” Molly smiled brightly. 

“Oh, the (Y/N) you always talked about who was best friends with Bill?” Remus asked, raising an eyebrow. “The one you basically adopted even though Dora’s parents had already taken her in.”

“Exactly.” You chuckled. “It was like I had three mothers.”

“Three?” Molly asked.

“My birth mother.” You chuckled but then your smile dropped. “She did only get to raise me for six years of my life but she was still my mother and my father was still my father.”

Everyone’s faces had fallen and they were looking at you in sympathy and concern. You quickly smiled at them, not wanting them to get sad.

“Anyways, where is everyone else or does the infamous Order Of The Phoenix only have like three members?”

Tonks gave you a concerned look but then smiled back. “Come on; you need to meet everyone. There’s Arthur Weasley, Bill Weasley who will be overjoyed to see an old friend again I bet. There’s Sirius and-”

“Dear, she will see that on her own.” Remus said softly with a smile. 

Tonks looked at Remus for a few seconds and then chuckled a little, rubbing her neck. “Sorry, I’m just so excited to have her here. We haven’t talked much in the past few months.”

You felt guilty at that. Tonks and you had always been close but you were a little distant in the past few months. After everything that had happened since Harry had started attending school, you were reminded of your parents’ death and the guilt, mourning and vengeful thoughts made you isolate yourself. Tonks had been the one to reach out to you and you were eternally thankful for it.

“(Y/N)!” You heard someone exclaim and turned to see your old friend Bill at the top of the stairs. He quickly ran down and embraced you. “I’m so glad you’re safe. Things have been horrible lately. It’s good to see an old friend safe.”

You smiled softly. “Dito. I’m glad to be able to help. Where are all your brothers and your sister?” You chuckled.

Bill laughed a little. “Ron and Harry are I don’t know where. Fred and George are doing something weird with the replica of a human ear. Ginny is with Hermione and I don’t have any idea where everyone else is, to be honest.”

“I see.” You smirked. “So is Fleur here, too?”

“Not right now. She’s currently home but we will see each other again, soon. I’m actually planning to propose to her soon.”

“Really?” You smiled brightly. “I’m so happy for you! Oh, I need to meet her soon.”

“Another member?” You heard the unmistakable voice of Ron coming from the staircase. “Oh, wait! It’s (Y/N)!”

“(Y/N)?” Harry asked. “Bill’s friend (Y/N)?”

“Yes, that one.” Ron said and then smiled at you. “Hey, nice to see you again.”

“It’s great to be back.” You smiled. “I mean with you guys. I haven’t been to this place before. But it’s-” You stopped, looking around. “Nice.”

“Nice.” Someone laughed from behind you and you turned to see a raven-haired man behind you. You knew it was Sirius Black – you had seen him in the paper. “That’s not what I would describe it as but thank you.”

“And you are Sirius, right?” You pointed at him and narrowed your eyes.

“Yes, that’s me.” Sirius nodded. “You must be Bill’s friend (Y/N). He has been so happy to see you again. He hasn’t stopped talking about it for weeks.”

“You didn’t stop talking about how happy you were to have Remus back for months, either.” Bill shot back at him.

“I wasn’t making fun of you.” Sirius chuckled. “It was a joke, Bill.”

“I know, I know.” 

“Do you want me to show you around?” Sirius offered.

Tonks eyed the two of you and smiled. “Actually, I wanted to do it.”

Remus smiled a little. “Let Sirius do it. We can help Molly with dinner.”

You looked at Sirius and gave him a bright smile. “I’d love you to.”

The two of you left, you carrying your suitcases behind you with a levitation spell. Sirius led you up the stairs and to a little room on the first floor. You put the suitcases down and let Sirius show you around more.

“We usually just sit in the dining hall when we plan anything.” He said quickly. “I don’t know how much Tonks has told you.”

“A bit but she mostly talked about Remus.” You chuckled and smiled.

“So are you related? That’d make you related to me, I think.”

“No, we aren’t. Her mother Andromeda and my mother Wilhelmina were best friends in school. My mother asked her mother to take me in should anything happen which it did. I don’t know how much you would want to hear about it.”

“If you want to talk about it, I’d be here to listen.” Sirius offered.

You looked up at him. “Well, when I was six years old, Death Eaters found out where my family lived and since my parents were in the Order, they decided to set the house ablaze. My parents died but put up a protection spell that apparently lasted long enough for Andromeda to find me.” 

“I’m so sorry. That must have been a horrifying experience.”

“It was.” You tried to laugh it off. “I’m not a fan of fire as you might guess.”

“I wish someone else could have raised me.” Sirius mused, letting his fingers run across the carvings on the doorframe. “My mother was a terrible woman.”

“I’m sorry.” You whispered. “Tonks told me you ran away.”

“I did.”

“Where to?”

“The Potters.” Sirius smiled. “Harry’s father and I were best friends, just as Remus and I were.”

“I see.” You smiled softly. “I’m glad the Potters took you in. I’m sure they loved you very dearly.”

Sirius looked at you then. “Why did you not come around sooner? I’m sure Tonks would have been happy about it.”

“Since Harry started going to Hogwarts, You-Know-Who’s followers have been a bit more- let’s say active. It stirred up some very bad memories and I was caught up in a whirlwind of wanting to avenge my family and not daring to do anything.” You whispered and then shook your head. “I sound like Hamlet, don’t I?”

“I have no idea who that is.” Sirius admitted.

“It’s a book. I can lend it to you sometime if you want to.”

“I know what it feels like to really want revenge. When we found Peter again a few years ago, I wanted nothing more than to kill him but Harry stopped Remus and I. He said James wouldn’t have wanted his friends to become murderers.” Sirius looked at you. “I’m sure your parents wouldn’t have wanted you to have become a vengeful, violent person, either.”

You looked back up at him with a soft smile. “That’s a good sentiment, I think. I felt guilty about not doing much to avenge them but perhaps they wouldn’t have wanted that. My parents were always peaceful, after all.”

“You see? Sometimes revenge isn’t the way to go.” The man said softly. “I’m glad to have you here with us. I’m sure you can really help us.”

“I’m glad to be here.” You smiled at him. “I like you.”

“I like you, as well.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Sirius get pretty close after a heart-to-heart conversation.

The first meeting you had joined was three days after you had arrived. You had started to befriend most of the people there, cooking with Molly, talking to Sirius or reminiscing with Bill. But the meeting itself had gone terribly. Everyone had ended up fighting and eventually, Arthur had decided to call it a day. Slowly, everyone had left the room until only you and Sirius were left. You watched him as he took another sip from his glass, sighing softly.

“Sirius, are you quite alright?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” He hissed quietly, taking another sip. “Because everyone seems to think that I am incapable of watching over Harry? Because they all think I am a horrible godfather?”

“No one thinks that.” You insisted.

“They may not say it, but I am sure that they think it.” Sirius looked back at you. “I mean they are right. I was in Azkaban for twelve years when I should have been there to watch out for Harry.”

You got up and walked over to him, sitting down next to him. “That wasn’t your fault. If anyone is to blame, it is Peter Pettigrew but not you, Sirius. Had you not been framed for a crime you didn’t commit, you would have been there.”

“But even now I cannot really be there for him, can I now? I’m stuck in this house.”

“That isn’t your fault, either. You are confined to this house because Peter framed you. You are still there for him and I know it. I mean I heard that you scraped together was little money you had to buy him a Firebolt.” 

“Material gifts mean nothing.”

“Maybe not if you are terribly rich but for someone who had nothing at the time to scrape together what little he had to buy his godson a gift, means a lot.” You said gently. “I also heard that you talk to him a lot. I heard you talking yesterday. You help him with his conflicted feelings. Is that not enough?”

“Apparently it isn’t.” Sirius huffed but you saw the sadness on his face. “You heard Molly!”

“What she said was not okay but I’m sure she didn’t mean it. She is stressed and probably regrets it already. Before you know it, she will come around to apologize.” You said softly. “And it really shouldn’t matter what she thinks about you caring for Harry; what matters should be his opinion.”

“Thank you, (Y/N).” He said out of the blue. “You’re really good with words.”

You sighed. “I wish I could tell you that I got it from my father but I rarely remember our conversations. All I know is that everyone that has met him, says that he had a way with words and was great at comforting people.”

“I’m sure they are right.” Sirius smiled softly. “A glass of wine?”

You nodded and summoned your glass into your hand from your previous spot at the other side of the table. “Gladly.”

About an hour later the two of you were still sitting by the dying fire, laughing and talking. You were happy that you managed to cheer Sirius up and that you were able to find out what a nice laugh he had. You smiled softly as you looked him over.

“What are you grinning at?” He chuckled quietly and put the glass down.

You grinned. “You thought the joke was truly that funny? Calling you Harry’s dogfather was that funny?”

“Maybe not that funny but I haven’t laughed like that in a long time.” He said with a soft smile.”Thank you, (Y/N).”

“I’m glad that I could make you laugh.”

He leaned in closer, smirking. “But if you tell the kids about the godfather-dogfather joke, I will be mad at you. They would never let me hear the end of it.”

“Oh, really?” You chuckled, grinning teasingly. “Maybe I should get up and tell the twins about it, then. They’d love to hear about it.”

“Don’t you dare!” Sirius exclaimed dramatically.

You grinned back at him, opening your mouth as you began to yell out the twins’ names. Before you could get much out, Sirius pulled you by the arm and pressed his lips to yours. As quickly as the kiss had started, it ended again. Sirius parted and slid back in his chair while you touched your lips in surprise.

“(Y/N), I’m so sorry. You were smiling and- you called out to the twins and I’m- I’m so sorry.” He shook his head.

You quietly shook your head before pulling at his arm. When he turned back to look at you, you kissed him again. This time the kiss lasted longer, the two of you ending up pressed close to one another, eyes closed and bodies intertwined.

After what felt like an eternity, the two of you parted. You kept your forehead against Sirius’ and waited for him to open his eyes. When he did, you smiled brightly.

“(Y/N), is this a good idea?”

“Do you not want to?” You asked softly. “I won’t be mad if you don’t.”

“No, I want to.” Sirius said softly. “You’re so different, so bright and happy. But I don’t want this to end badly.”

“It won’t.” You promised. “Will you come to my room with me? The fire is dying and it’s getting cold. I need someone to keep me warm.”

Sirius didn’t speak for a few painful moments before he smiled uncertainly. “Are you sure?”

You breathed a sigh of relief. “Yes, I am.”

\---

The next morning you woke up to Sirius moving next to you. When you turned your head, you saw that he was holding you tightly, his face buried at your neck. A smile spread across your face as you started to stroke his pretty hair.

“Morning.” He mumbled from next to you, blinking up at you. 

“Good morning.” You smiled. “You look pretty adorable with a bed-head.”

“I’m anything but adorable.” Sirius said, trying to sound stern but ending up laughing. “Really now, (Y/N), if anyone is adorable, you are.”

“Why should I be adorable?” You laughed softly. 

Sirius began to stroke your arm absentmindedly. “Everything you do is. You’re so bright, happy and warm.” He then paused. “Maybe last night wasn’t a good idea.”

“Why’s that?” You asked, propping yourself up on your arm.

“We were tipsy and reckless. We shouldn’t have done this.” Sirius sat back up. “You should go with someone younger, someone who’s your age, who’s whole and not like me. You’re so lovely and bright; I’m just a sad, lonely man.”

“That’s ridiculous!” You exclaimed. “Sirius, if I wanted anyone else, I wouldn’t have gone for you!”

“Shh.” He hissed softly. “I don’t want the others to hear us fighting.”

“Fighting?” You mumbled. “Sirius, will you listen to me?”

“We should-”

There was a knock on the door and you heard Tonks’ voice. “(Y/N)? Are you coming down for breakfast?”

“In a minute. I’m getting dressed!” You got up and started to put on your clothes as you listened to Tonks leaving again, telling you to hurry up. “Sirius, don’t be ridiculous. Why would you think so?”

“You were tipsy. I shouldn’t have gone with you.”

“What? So were you.” You shrugged. “We both drank so why should you feel guilty and not me? I can decide what I do. I’m a grown woman!”

“Let’s not talk about this now.” Sirius buttoned up his shirt. “Perhaps later.”

“Sirius, will you please just listen to me?”

Sirius walked towards the door. “You deserve better.”

“But you are the best!”

“We barely know each other!”

“We know each other well enough!” You called after him as he opened the door. “We could get to know each other better!”

Sirius shook his head and walked down the stairs. “Get dressed. We should head to breakfast. I wouldn’t want you to go hungry.”

With that, he rounded the corner and left you in the doorway to think about what to do about this now.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensions rise after your and Sirius' last encounter.

Once you made it to the dining room, Tonks got up and clapped you on the back, grinning widely. For a second you were scared that she noticed what you and Sirius had done last night but when she nodded towards the glasses on the counter, you were relieved.

“Had a bit of a drink with Sirius?” She chuckled. “Should have invited me!”

Remus raised an eyebrow in amusement. “At least you didn’t drink too much – at least that’s what it looks like.”

You chuckled a bit and looked for a seat and just as luck would have it, the only free one was next to Sirius. Slowly, you sat down next to him, giving him a smile.

“Hey.”

He nodded at you before quickly averting his gaze and drinking a sip of pumpkin juice. You were a little angry now. Of course, you understood that everything was hard for him and that he felt bad about the intercourse you had. You totally understood if he didn’t want to latch himself onto you every chance he got but to ignore you like that made you angry. Thus, you decided to tease him a bit.

“I had fun last night.” You smiled at him.

“I’m glad.” Sirius reached for a plate of sausage. “Sausage?”

“Oh no, I’ve had plenty of it last night.”

Tonks gave you a questioning look while Sirius turned his head to look at you in a slight panic. You smiled at him.

“There was some left from dinner.” You shrugged. “But perhaps one shouldn’t be too much.” With that, you picked one up with a fork and put it on your plate. “Thanks.”

Tonks looked at you and smiled. “So, did you two have fun last night? I heard you talking for a long time.”

“Oh, yes. We had a lot of fun.” You nodded, eyeing Sirius out of the corner of your eyes. “He thinks I’m funny.”

“You are.” Tonks chuckled. 

Bill chuckled from across the table. “Did you make bad puns again?”

“Of course.”

“Charming, isn’t it?” Bill chuckled. 

“I am very charming.” You grinned a little. 

Sirius nodded absentmindedly and began to eat his breakfast. When you were sure he was watching, you dug your fork into your sausage to pick it up. Then you took it into your mouth, mindful to wrap your lips around it suggestively before biting off a piece and slowly chewing it. You didn’t even like sausages but the look on Sirius’ face was worth it.

Sirius cleared his throat nervously from next to you and took another sip of his pumpkin juice. When you looked up you saw Tonks looking at you in amusement.

“I thought you hated sausages.” She chuckled.

You shrugged and smiled. “I may have gotten a taste for them since I’ve been here, especially since last night and especially if it’s that big and juicy.”

Sirius, next to you, choked on his drink and began coughing. Harry, next to him, started to hit his back and the man eventually calmed down, swallowing thickly. Everyone was looking at him, you included. He turned to give you a warning look and you smiled innocently.

“Are you okay?” You asked softly. “Maybe take another sip to settle your throat.”

Sirius merely nodded and took his cup, taking a sip before looking at you. “Do you think we could talk for a moment? I need to ask you something.”

“Right now?” You feigned innocence. “But I want to finish breakfast.”

“Breakfast can wait a couple of minutes.”

He got up and you followed, motioning at the other people at the table to continue eating. Hermione gave you a questioning look, just like Tonks and Remus did. Molly and Arthur went back to eating and so did the rest of the Weasleys. Ron seemed to haven’t noticed anything off.

Sirius kept walking until the two of you were in the study where he locked the door and turned to you, crossing his arms. You smiled at him.

“You need to stop teasing me.” 

“You need to stop ignoring me.”

“(Y/N), I told you that this is a bad idea.”

“Sirius, I told you that this is a good idea.”

Sirius sighed in exasperation. “Stop doing that.”

“Doing what?”

“Acting as if it’s that easy.” He rubbed his cheek. “I don’t want you to be stuck with someone like me, someone that’s-”

“That’s what?” You raised an eyebrow. “Caring and nice? Someone that’s brave, smart and passionate? Doesn’t sound too bad to me.”

“(Y/N), don’t say these things.”

You got closer to him until he was backed against the door. “I want you.”

Sirius looked at you in confusion. “But why?”

“Because I like you the most of everyone I’ve ever met. Because you are an amazing person.” You said softly. “Give me a chance; just a tiny one.”

Sirius nodded and then smirked. “But you have to stop teasing me.”

Getting the idea of where this conversation was headed, you smirked at him. “Oh, why is that?”

He pressed his body into yours and you understood. “Because I could hardly compose myself when you kept talking about thick and juicy-”

“Oh, sausages turn you on?” You chuckled. “What a weird paraphilia.”

“You know what I mean.” He laughed softly. “How long do you think we have until they get suspicious?”

“Enough time.”

“What about breakfast?”

“Breakfast can wait a couple of minutes.”

\---

“They’ve been gone for quite some time.” Tonks eventually said, putting her fork down. “I think I’ll check on them. They were fighting earlier, as well.”

“I don’t hear anyone fighting.” Ron shrugged. “They’re fine.”

Tonks narrowed her eyes. “The lack of fighting is what worries me.”

Remus looked at her in question. “What do you mean?”

“I’ll be back in a few minutes. You just finish up breakfast. I want to tell them that their eggs and sausages are getting cold.” With that, she got up and left the room.

She walked a bit before she came into the hallways that connected to the study. As soon as she rounded the corner, she heard noises. Quietly, she crept up to the door to listen and what she heard was not up for interpretation – it was pretty obvious what the two of you were doing.

A banging noise of something wooden hitting a shelf of sorts over and over again could be heard from the outside, accompanied by moaning and other noises of that variety.

There was moaning from a voice that was unmistakably yours. “Sirius!”

“Shh.” Came another voice that was obviously Sirius’ before there was a moan from that voice as well. “O-Oh, yes!”

“Shh, yourself.” Your voice breathed with a chuckle. “W-we gotta hurry up!”

The wooden banging got louder until the female voice let out a high-pitched moan that was quickly muffled by something. Following shortly after, the male voice gave a low moan before everything went quiet for a few seconds.

Tonks took a few steps back before retreating towards the living area, mumbling to herself. “Nope, I didn’t need to hear that! Didn’t need to hear that at all!”

“Dora.” Remus stopped her with a hand to the shoulder. “Love, are they coming? Are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Oh, I’ve heard things but they weren’t ghosts.” She mumbled lowly. 

“What was it then? Screaming portraits again?” Remus questioned.

Tonks briefly wondered how he could be so naïve but then again she didn’t expect to find that, as well. “Worse.”

“Should we check on (Y/N) and Sirius? Were they fighting?” Remus asked in concern. “I know being crammed up in here is agitating but I’m sure they can work it out.”

“They’ve done a good job working it out without our help.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus and Tonks try to solve the problem but don't really do so.

The next two days, you and Sirius spent closer to one another. You still saw the hesitance in his eyes but tried your best to work against it. One afternoon the two of you had sat in the study, you in his lap when you finally decided to confront him.

“Do you have feelings for me?”

Sirius looked up from the spell-book on the table. “Obviously, I do.”

“No, I mean are you in love with me?”

Sirius swallowed thickly. “Perhaps we should go downstairs to help Molly with dinner.”

“Oh, stop that!” You hissed. “I asked you a simple question.”

“Simple?” He looked up at you. “I- Countless times, I have told you that you deserve someone better. I was under the impression that once you found someone better, you would go with them.”

“What? I would never.” You stood from his lap. “Sirius, I want no one else!”

“Why?” He shouted at you but his voice sounded desperate. “You could have anyone! You could have some young, free, whole man that actually gets to leave the house, gets to live freely. You deserve someone that makes you happy!”

“You make me happy!”

Before he could answer there was a knock on the door. It opened to reveal Tonks.

“Oh, you two were in here together?” She entered. “I wanted to talk to Sirius.”

Sirius looked up from the table. “What is it?”

“In private.” She looked at you. “Could you wait outside for a few seconds?”

You nodded curtly, giving Sirius a pointy look. “A bit of space to calm down is going to do me some good.”

Tonks watched you leave before she used her wand to close the door. Then she turned to Sirius, her hands on her hips. Sirius stood from the table took look at her.

“What do you need?”

“You’ve gotten quite close to (Y/N).” She raised an eyebrow, choosing a tentative approach. “I’ve seen you together quite often now. You seem to like her.”

“She’s nice and funny.” Sirius said softly. “She’s a brilliant witch.”

Tonks bit her tongue and tried a different approach. “That day when you two drank together after the meeting, you became pretty close, right?”

Sirius nodded, trying not to make it obvious that anything had happened between the two of you. “Yes, we talked a lot.”

The purple-haired woman groaned in frustration and then shook her head, deciding that there was no other way than being forward. “You’ve been sleeping with her, haven’t you?”

“What?” Sirius sputtered. “I- with (Y/N)? With your best friend? With-”

“Don’t lie to me.” Tonks hissed, her hair flaming red. “I heard you and I can’t believe you’d take advantage of her like that! The anniversary of her parents' death is coming up and You-Know-Who is gaining power which only reminds her of it more!”

Sirius was taken aback, staring at Tonks with wide eyes. “Advantage? She wanted me to-“ He stopped then. “No, you’re right.”

Tonks calmed down a little, confusion outweighing her anger as she looked at Sirius in wonder. “What do you mean?”

“I’m horrible!” Sirius exclaimed. “I slept with her; more than once! I tried to tell her off but I couldn’t! I wanted her to be with someone else; someone who’s young, whole and free!”

“Sirius-”

“I couldn’t push her away!” Sirius took a step toward Tonks. “Tonks, I’m sorry! There was this warmth about her, this brightness, this happiness!”

“Sirius, stop!” She exclaimed suddenly. “What are you saying?”

“I’m so sorry.”

Tonks swallowed. She had seen this before in Remus. She had seen the desperation in Sirius’ eyes, heard the tremble in his voice and seen the way he looked at you. And at that moment she realised she had seen this happen before.

“You love her.” Tonks said softly.

“I-“ Sirius was dumbfounded. “She’s so bright, happy and intelligent. Everything she does radiates such warmth and I can’t help but feel drawn to her.”

“That’s-”

“Wrong! I know it’s wrong! She should be with someone younger, someone that hasn’t been rotting away in Azkaban for twelve years, someone that can make her happy.”

“You seem to make her happy.”

“What?”

“She seems so happy around you, always smiling at you, making jokes and teasing you. It’s been some time since I’ve seen her like this.” Tonks explained softly. “Perhaps you should give this relationship a chance.”

“A chance?” Sirius was dumbfounded. “You said I took advantage of her a few minutes ago! I thought you’d be happy if I cut her off and left her alone!”

“No, that was before I-“ Tonks shook her head. “Listen, I thought you took advantage of her and simply wanted to sleep with her. But I couldn’t have guessed that you had feelings for her. You care for her so just give it a try. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“I could not be enough and make her unhappy. She’d be lonely, depressed and miserable, stuck in this godforsaken place with me.” 

“That was actually a rhetorical question, Sirius.” Tonks mumbled, rubbing her neck. “But I promise you that you can make her happy. You just have to try a bit and be a bit more –how do I say this– confident and affectionate.”

“You think so?”

“Absolutely! Show her that you care.”

“I will.”

\---

Meanwhile, you stood outside, listening in on the conversation until you couldn’t take any more of the horrible feelings Sirius had about himself. You quickly walked away from the door, looking at the ground miserably before you collided with someone.

“(Y/N), watch out.” It was Remus.

“Sorry, I’ll-”

“What’s wrong?” He asked softly. “Are you not feeling well? Or is this about the whole Sirius situation?”

“You know?” 

“Dora told me.” Remus confessed. “She was pretty worried about you. I think she wanted to talk to Sirius about it.”

“She is!” You exclaimed. “And she’s telling him that he took advantage of me which he didn’t! As if he wasn’t self-conscious enough! I feel so horrible and I don’t even know why!”

“Hey, try to take deep breaths, yes?” He directed you. “Nice and easy.”

“Did I make a mistake? He has enough on his hands as it is and I’m sure I’m not really helping his self-confidence issues.” You shook your head. “Damn it, Remus. I really messed up.”

“But you are helping him.” Remus insisted. “He’s been a lot happier since you two started your- let’s call it a relationship.”

“Really? He seems like he doesn’t want to actually be in a relationship.” You sighed softly. “Remus, I know you had doubts when you got with Dora, so do you think he’ll get over it just like you did?”

Remus looked at you for a few seconds and smiled. “I’m sure he will. Give him a little bit of space to figure things out himself, maybe a day or two just to think. I’m sure he’d love to be with you. You make him happy.”

“You think so?”

“I know it.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things never work out, do they?

“(Y/N)!“ Sirius exclaimed as he walked towards you.

“Yes?” You turned around.

“I want to talk about earlier.” He said lowly.

You put a hand on his shoulder. “We don’t have to. It’s fine, really.”

Sirius was about to say something but you gave him a warm smile before walking off to talk to Tonks. The man stood there for a few minutes, thinking about what to do before he swore silently and left.

Later that day, you were walking downstairs to talk to someone when Sirius pulled you into a room with him, closing the door behind you. You gasped in shock but quickly calmed down when you saw it was him.

“You scared me there.”

“I’m sorry.” Sirius whispered. “Can we talk now?”

“Sirius, you don’t have to explain yourself to me.” You waved him off, trying to be as nonchalant as possible. “I gotta go and talk to Bill. I’ll see you at dinner.”

“(Y/N), wait! I want to talk.”

“No, you didn’t want to and that’s the problem.”

\---

Sirius awkwardly sat down next to you during dinner, slowly turning to smile at you. You gave him a quick smile before you started to eat. Sirius ground his teeth. Here he was, willing to talk and now you weren’t willing to. Of course, he understood why you were angry about his distance before but he had hoped to explain it to you.

“(Y/N), could we-”

“You need something?” You asked, pointing at the salt. “The salt?”

“No, I-”

“The pepper?” You smiled at him. “I got you.”

You slowly reached over and handed him the pepper. Sirius looked at you in confusion and slight annoyance. He really wanted to talk to you and give it a chance but now you thought you had to give him space. Neither Tonks nor Remus realised what they had kicked loose with their attempts to help.

Sirius grabbed the pepper from your hands, thanking you curtly before sprinkling it on his food, watching you intently from the corners of his eyes. You slowly began to eat, talking to Bill. Sirius’ grip on the pepper shaker tightened. 

He knew he shouldn’t feel any jealousy at seeing you laugh and talk with Bill, who was your old friend and nothing more. Bill had Fleur and you had emphasized that you truly wanted Sirius but now that you were turning him away, he couldn’t help the pang of jealousy in his chest. Bill was a sweet, whole and young man; all the things Sirius wasn’t. He didn’t have the right to feel jealous but he did.

“Sirius?” Fred called out.

“I’m good.” Sirius replied without looking at the boy.

“I’m sure.” George began laughing. “I didn’t know you wanted all the pepper for yourself to cover your whole plate in it.”

Sirius snapped out of it and looked down to where he was still sprinkling pepper on his food. He quickly put the shaker down and pushed his plate away slightly, mumbling about being distracted. Molly got up, quickly making her way to the stove to get Sirius new food but he stopped her.

“I’ll just have some fruit. I’m not that hungry, anyway.”

“But you need to eat.”

“I ate loads for lunch. I will be fine.”

“If you’re sure.” Molly eyed him in worry before sitting back down and continuing to eat.

Sirius reached out to grab a peach from the basket on the table. He took a bite out of it when he saw you looking at him with a mix of confusion and worry written over your face. You watched on as he started eating the peach, taking great care to wrap his lips around it and lap up the juices. Heat spread across your cheeks at his display and when he was done, licking the juice of his fingers you were about ready to drag him somewhere private.

You were angry out of sudden. First, he turned you away every chance he got and then he had the guts to tease you about it. Slowly and with the utmost care, you reached forward to grab a banana. Sirius watched with wide eyes as you peeled it and shoved it into your mouth, wrapping your lips around it and taking a large bite.

That’s when someone cleared their throat. Sirius dropped the remains of the peach and you put the banana down. Everyone else looked pretty uncomfortable. Arthur was avoiding his eyes while Molly looked somewhere between mortified and amused. Ron and Harry were trying not to laugh and Fred and Goerge had failed at that. Hermoine was trying to act as if she hadn't noticed. Tonks and Remus seemed rather amused and Bill had his fork frozen in midair, watching on.

“Could you please stop fellating the food and talk about your relationship troubles?”

You turned to Remus with a mortified look on your face. “Don’t tell everyone about-”

Molly shook her head. “We know, dear. It was pretty obvious. But I have to agree with Remus, you should talk about it.”

“Yes, I don’t want every other dinner ruined by someone suggestively licking fruit or sausages!” Ron exclaimed.

That earned him a smack on the arm by Hermoine. “Don’t say it like that.”

“It’s frankly uncomfortable to watch, you know?” Harry raised his eyebrows. “I support you two with all my heart but please get a room.”

“Harry!”

Bill looked on from Hermoine to you. “What’s the problem anyway? You two are great together. Just roll with it.”

“She’s so wonderful.” Sirius said as if that was explanation enough.

“Yes, and?”

“And I’m not. I’m broken and locked in this house. And I really tried to make it work but she’s ignoring me!”

“You know I have feelings for you! You know it and you still pretend that this is for my own good? You kept ignoring me for days on end! That hurt!”

“Well, now I’m the one trying to make it work and you keep ignoring me!” Sirius exclaimed, rising from the table. “You are so hypocritical!”

“And you are so immature!” You stood. “You think you can ignore me for days and expect everything to work itself out?”

Remus tried to intervene at that. “I think we should-”

You two answered him in unison. “Shut up, Remus.”

Tonks got up. “Come on! Talk this out!”

“He obviously doesn’t want to!”

“You obviously don’t want to!”

“I’m going to my room.” You announced and left.

“And now you’re leaving?” Sirius called after you. “Are you just going to keep ignoring me?” 

A slam of your door was the only answer you got. Sirius groaned in frustration and buried his hands in his hair. Remus stood up and put a hand to his back while everyone else watched on it uncomfortable silence.

“We’ll figure this out.”

“No, I keep messing up. She’s better off without me!”

With that, he left as well. Remus sat back down and Molly eyed the spot where you and Sirius had been sitting in worry. Arthur looked up from his food and Tonks pursed her lips in thought.

“And I even told him to finally tell her about these feelings.” She mumbled.

“What?” Remus looked at her. “I told her to stop talking about her feelings and give him a few days to figure his own feelings out.”

“Oh, bollocks!” Ron exclaimed. “Seriously?”

“You two are the worst.” Bill mumbled out.

Remus and Tonks responded at the same time, turning their heads to Bill. “I was just trying to help.”

“We need to figure something out.” Molly said softly. “They were so happy around one another. They deserve to be happy.”

“We’ll figure something out.” Fred assured.

George nodded. “Matter of fact, I already have a few ideas.”

“No fireworks.” Molly said sternly. “Behave yourselves.”

“We’re trying to help!” Fred exclaimed and his twin brother nodded.

“We’ll come up with something.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, people talk about their issues.

“I shouldn’t have left yesterday. I should have been mature and talked it through.”

Bill looked back at you, putting his knife down. “Hey, come on. Everyone should probably do different than how they actually act but you’re not in the wrong, you know? I totally get why you’re acting the way you are.”

“Acting the way I am?”

“You know, first you pester Sirius, then you try to avoid him. Remus told me that he told you to give him space so it’s only understandable that you did. I mean, they were best friends.”

You sighed and out the carrots into the boiling water in front of you. “I know, it’s just- he tried to talk it through but I was being an idiot.”

“No, you had every reason to think he needed space.”

“I messed everything up.”

“You didn’t. And I’m sure you will figure out how to overcome your problems.”

You sighed softly and thanked him before you got back to cooking. Bil was about to say something when you stopped him, confused by the weird noise coming from the stove. When you told him about it he inspected it but found nothing. After your proclamation that he should go ask Molly about it, he left and you took a few steps back, scared of breaking anything.

Just as Bill had run up the stairs to get his mother, the worst possible thing happened. Something exploded and you jumped a few feet back. That’s when the fire started. Whatever had caught fire seemed pretty flammable because the whole stove was immediately engulfed in flames. You screamed out in shock as you stumbled backwards, scrambling to get your wand.

“Aguamenti!” You called out but the water you shot at the flames did little to stifle them. 

If you had been in the right mind, you would have probably thought about putting something like a blanket over the flames and not using water, but you were too terrified to speak. Memories of flames filled your mind, screams of agony ringing through your head as tears gathered in your eyes. You could still hear your parent’s agonized screams as they perished to the flames with only enough time to protect you from them.

You took a few more steps back when you collided with something. When you looked up you saw Sirius in the door, looking shocked and alarmed. Without thinking you turned around, clinging to him.

“It won’t extinguish! I tried to put it out! I don’t know what happened!”

Other members had gathered in the hallway, too, watching the flames. Arthur and Remus did their best to extinguish the flames but nothing worked. That’s when Fred and George showed up to help. For some reason, they managed to extinguish the flames and everyone took a deep breath.

You were crying by the time the flames had died down and Sirius was holding you tightly, trying to shush you. Tonks tried her best to say something comforting while Molly made sure everyone was alright and Bill talked to his brothers.

“They’re gone. No more fire, alright?”

“I- they were screaming and- I couldn’t help them!” You sobbed out.

Sirius shushed you. “I know. It must have been horrifying. I can’t even begin to imagine how scared you must be right now but you’re alright. The flames are gone. I’ve got you.”

You clung to him tightly, not wanting to let go. Without thinking twice, Sirius leaned down to press a kiss to your head. You looked up at that, teary-eyed and clearly still frightened. He smiled softly, caringly and you leaned up to press a kiss to his mouth.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered. “I- I was so unsure of what to do. I-I really want to be with you and- well, would you give this a chance?”

“Absolutely.” He whispered. “I want to be with you, too. But do you think you can be happy with someone like me?”

“As long as you can be happy with someone like me.”

“(Y/N)!” He exclaimed. “Someone like you? You’re wonderful.”

“So are you.”

“Yes, but you’re so amazing.”

“So are you.”

“Oh, I see what you’re doing.” He said softly. “I just wanted to make sure that you are sure about this. I’m not the person I was before Askaban and right now, I’m not a free man either.”

“I don’t care.” You whispered. “You make me feel happy, safe and loved. I would wait decades in this house with you if it meant I could be with you. One day you will be a free man again. When we defeat You-Know-Who, they will see that you were never on his side and they will believe us.”

Sirius nodded. “I believe you even if it seems incredibly optimistic.”

“If I can make you a little more optimistic, it’s all worth it.” You whispered. “Thank you for calming me down.”

“Are you quite alright?” He leaned closer to press a kiss to your cheek. “You were pretty frightened.”

You smiled softly, wriggling your face away from him. “Yes, but stop kissing me when I’m covered in tears. That must be gross.”

“You could never be gross. I love you.”

At that, you leaned up to press a kiss to his cheeks. “I love you, too.”

“Hey, maybe later we should go to my room and celebrate if you catch my drift.”

You giggled a little. “Alright, I have something I want to try. We could get-”

“Okay!” Tonks exclaimed. “Wow, this was sweet and you guys ruined it again!”

Remus nodded. “I agree. I’m very glad you two have solved everything but please stop talking about your plans on how to get intimate.”

“Intimate?” Harry snorted. “You sound like a teacher telling children about the birds and the bees.”

“What? What bees?” Ron mumbled.

“Nevermind.” Hermoine chuckled. “I’m happy for the two of you.”

“Does that mean you will stop fellating food now?” Tonks chuckled.

Bill stopped the conversation. “I think Fred and George have some explaining to do before we go any further!”

“The fire was our fault.” Fred mumbled out. “We wanted to get the two of you together.”

“Yes, and nothing beats trauma bonding.” George added. “The fire was an illusion, hence why no one but us could extinguish it and why it didn’t damage the stove.”

“What?” Sirius looked up in anger. “What were you thinking?”

“Yes, that’s not okay, you two. She’s terrified of fire.” Tonks said sternly. “You could have come up with something better.”

“You make it sound like you’re angry at their lack of creativity.” Remus crossed his arms. “That’s was not alright, you two.”

“I am partially angry at their lack of creativity.” 

You looked up. “It’s fine. I’m fine now. Just promise me, no more fire pranks.”

Both of them nodded in unison and answered in tune with the other, too. “Promise.”

“That was creepy.” You chuckled.

“We can do it more!” The two of them said in unison.

“Please don’t.” Molly said softly. “(Y/N), are you sure you’re fine?”

“Yes, I am.” You smiled. “Let’s forget about the fire and talk about something else while we get back to working on dinner.”

Tonks grinned happily. “If the two of you get married, you and I will actually be related, (Y/N). You know, since Sirius is my cousin, I think.”

“You think?” Fred chuckled.

“Our family tree is confusing.” Tonks laughed.

“Didn’t your parents basically adopt her anyway?” Harry asked softly.

“Not really. They raised her and took her in but never officially adopted her.” Tonks explained. “But when the two of you get married, we will officially be related!”

“Now ‘if’ changed to ‘when’, I see.” Remus laughed.

“Yes, when they do get married one day, (Y/N) and I will be related.”

“Alright, one milestone after the other.” Sirius exclaimed, laughing nervously. 

“Do you not want to stay with me?”

“No, I- (Y/N), that’s not- of course, I do!”

“I’m joking.” You interrupted with a laugh. “Relax.”

“You could help me relax.” Sirius kissed your temple.

“Maybe getting you together was a mistake.” The twins mumbled.

“Hey!” You laughed.

“It’s better than sexual tension.” Ron chuckled.

“Ron!” Hermoine exclaimed.

“You’re all horrible.” Remus said in amusement before looking at you and Sirius. “Congratulations, though. I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks.” You whispered and leaned into Sirius.

He smiled. “As long as she is happy with me, I’m happy.”

You smiled softly and kissed him quickly. Sirius smiled back at you as you spoke up again. “I don’t see what I could see in anyone else but you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was quick upload because I had it sitting in my drafts, so I hope you enjoyed it ^^  
> No one seems to care about this one in particular. I'll write something else soon. Just wanted to finally get it out ^^  
> See you and stay safe!

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked this and as always Kudos and Comments are appreciated and greatly motivating!  
> Hope you all stay healthy and safe. See you ^^


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